The Heart Matters

31486261#31486261 - A link to the Today show report on “outdated marriage.”

Upon reading the article, On marriage: Let’s call the whole thing off, a clever play on the song by George Gershwin, I am at a loss for words. Perhaps, it is not a loss of words, rather a sense of being slapped in the face with a piece of rotting meat. I am astonished. Marriage is no longer viable. It is outdated and unrealistic, not worth the time.

This was news to me, a mother of four sons, ages 15 through 9, married now for 18 years, most of which have been amazingly fulfilling and full of love. Sweat dripped from my brow as I calculated the time left for me in antiquated marriage. Two years until I wake up and file the papers. Gulp.

Author Sandra Tsing Loh, after 20 years of hard work as mother, companion, professional writer, household manager and “go-fer,” has decided to get a divorce. She laments that she just works too hard to attempt to put the romance back into a marriage that lost the heat long ago. Her marriage is not worth her effort. She hasn’t got time for the pain.

After counseling sessions and confessing an affair, not only has Ms. Loh opted for divorce, but she is now questioning the entire institution of marriage. Marriage is not worth it. This is not a view from an embittered divorcee, but rather the insight of the enlightened. She writes :

Why do we still insist on marriage? Sure, it made sense to agrarian families before 1900, when to farm the land, one needed two spouses, grandparents, and a raft of children. But now that we have white-collar work and washing machines, and our life expectancy has shot from 47 to 77, isn’t the idea of lifelong marriage obsolete?

Well, it seems that in many Western countries the notion of marriage is becoming less popular as statistics from the World Values Survey indicate, while Americans embrace marriage as “highly valued,” even though America has the highest divorce rate of any country. Ms. Loh points out that Americans have the highest view of marriage.

“Marriage is an outdated institution” than citizens of any other Western country surveyed (compare the U.S.’s tiny 10 percent with France’s 36 percent). We are also more religious — more Americans (60 percent) say they attend religious services once a month than do the Vatican-centric Italians (54 percent) or, no surprise, the laissez-faire French (12 percent). At the same time, Americans endure the highest divorce rate in the Western world. In short, although we say we love religion and marriage, Cherlin notes, “religious Americans are more likely to divorce than secular Swedes.”

So Americans are a marriage centric nation of individuals who embrace the values of monogamy in marriage as well as the pursuit of personal happiness. Loh observes that since Americans value individualism as well as happily-ever-after-marriage, these competing values result in divorce, which explains our country’s high divorce rate as compared to other nations.

Honestly, I found this argument intriguing, for she argues that our sense of the individual over community, or even family, contradicts the substance of marriage.  Hence, Americans are doomed to the grinding cycle of marriage, divorce, remarriage, divorce and so forth. It just isn’t worth it. Interesting concept, I suppose.

Then, Ms. Loh begins to share her observations with her core group of women friends, who all have been married for many years.Soon after Ms. Loh divorced and shared her enlightened perspective, that they too were considering to make the break from the bonds that imprison them. They too just don’t have the time to make their marriages work. Marriage and love relationships take work. Effort is required.

Far better to be happy as an individual and to arrange some sort of civil agreement with the baby-daddies. So long as the children are not disturbed and they have the security of a household where mom and dad come and go, no harm done. The kids are just fine. Just follow the rules. Rules do not require love. Rules make it easier – to make excuses – or to leave.

That's right ladies - you don't need a man.

This is where my brain pops forth from my skull. So, Ms. Loh and Company, since you and your gal pals all have white collar jobs, which equals wealth, you can purchase your freedom. You will have your home – apart from your ex and your kids. Your ex will need his separate place. Your children will have their fake – fairyland home where mom and dad come and go. I count three households, unless you and your ex share a pad.

This plan is economic disaster for anyone other than the wealthy, not to mention it is peculiar. So what you are really saying is that the wealthy can have their separate lives and marriage is outdated for them. The poor and undereducated, well, they must remain in outmoded marriage, even though it is supposedly biological torture – as humans only experience the sensation of chemical induced love for the max of four years.

Geez, after reading this article, I felt like I had just finished watching the HBO series Rome. Now that was a show full of debauchery – masses of intertwined flesh - the wealthy women had all the choices – plotting for power, using their bodies for gain. For them, marriage was a power play of position and political strategy. Personally, I am having difficulty seeing the difference from what Ms. Loh is proposing and what I witnessed in that series – moral and civil decline, not to mentioned the absence of  love.

So now the women’s movement is recruiting wives of modern wealth and education to leave their husbands, or heck, never marry. You reason, children only suffer harm when a string of men are introduced to them. Those children must bond with these men and, in turn, suffer repetitive emotional loss. Children thrive in a stable home where civility and rules are followed. Under your paradigm, love is not necessary, because love takes work.

A world without genuine loving relationships is what you postulate, Ms. Loh. A world where men and women do not sacrifice and work at love – is a world not worth living in. A world lived for self only – is a world without God. It is a world of death and decay. Maybe that’s why I felt as though I was hit in the face with rotten flesh – for that is what man and women are with out love.

The apostle Paul put it best in 1Cor 13: 1-3.

If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.

Sometimes, we need to take a good look at ourselves and acknowledge that love takes work and it requires sacrifice that is other’s focused. I know that after reading this article, I am taking a good look at myself.

I use rules all the time to replace the work – the huge painful effort- that love requires. It is not easy – that is for sure, but is it genuine and it is alive. Love focused outwards is anything, but decayed. It is everything that is good.

Happy 18th anniversary, Steve. I love you more than when we first said “I do.”

Additional Information

In San Diego, the right to gather in homes for fellowship and prayer is being called into question by the county government. Neighbors have filed complaints, citing parking problems and safety issues as the reason. Local officials agree. This group is a nuisance. They are breaking the rules.

Pastor David Jones claims that this small gathering of Christians does not qualify as large church assembly. “Full-blown” church services require permits which cost in the thousands of dollars. Pastor Jones believes that they are being unjustly harassed, even persecuted.

“We are talking about as little as five [people], a high meeting of 27, but on average 15,” explains Jones. “To find that the county says this is a code violation is really wrong.”

So, Pastor Dave has retained an attorney and could be taking this to federal court, if fines are enforced. He (as well as Miss California) are outraged – even shocked – that their first amendment rights are being violated. After all it’s America. Our rights are sacred. In fact, countless people have died and continue to die to preserve our Constitutional rights.

Stones of Arlington National Cemetery, white washed monoliths, bear witness

Arlington National Cemetery bears witness to the belief system that says, “Country First,” which is now a grassroots movement started by former POW John McCain.”  

We are at a moment of national crisis that will determine our future as a people and as a country. I have spent my life serving our nation and will continue to fight in order to right the path of our great country. America is worth fighting for. Nothing is inevitable here. We never give up. We never quit. We never hide from history. We make history.

Though many Christians would argue that God is first in their lives, fighting to preserve our national freedom is often at the heart of many conservative Christians. My own family has a long, distinguished military service record, a record I am very proud of, and yet, I question whether as Christians we should being so willing to take up the sword, or the lawyer, to defend our rights.

Why not stand firm and suffer the at the hands of an oppressive government? This pacifist approach, more often than not, wins the heart of watching world. Was it not the cruel torture and brutal crucifixions of the first Christ followers that moved the Roman world to compassion? Their undeserved suffering, moved hundreds upon thousands to embrace Christ as Lord. The spontaneous expansion of the “church” affirms this as fact. Did not our hearts weep for the Chinese as tanks bore down upon university students in Tiananmen Square?

In light of this perspective should not Pastor Jones and his congregation rejoice that they are suffering shame for Christ? Christ said:

“God blesses you when people mock you and persecute you and lie about you and say all sorts of evil things against you because you are my followers. Be happy about it! Be very glad! For a great reward awaits you in heaven. And remember, the ancient prophets were persecuted in the same way. Matthew 5:11-12

What blessings await you when people hate you and exclude you and mock you and curse you as evil because you follow the Son of Man. When that happens, be happy! Yes, leap for joy! For a great reward awaits you in heaven. And remember, their ancestors treated the ancient prophets that same way. Luke 6:22-23

Instead of whining and demanding  protection under the first amendment rights, should this congregation not continue to gather in neighborhoods, parks, and even more open venues? Be respectful, be faithful and be filled with joy. You are worthy to suffer for the name. Pastor Dave you should be dancing in the streets!

Being harassed and bullied never feels good. It is difficult. We just want to complain. We as humans instinctively defend our rights and privileges. If we are “dised,” we demand justice. However, as believers we are the no longer under the power and authority of the ruler of this world, who is Satan. We are part of the kingdom of God. We are the “called out ones.”  Romans 12:2 says, “We do not have to be conformed to the ways of this world, but we are continually transformed by the renewing of our minds.” We must learn to think in a radical, different way.

In this situation, the radical, yet loving stance, would be to continue to meet. If there are parking issues, try to be respectful of neighbors. Try car pooling. Explain why you believe what you believe, but do so out of humility and gentleness, not out of outrage or of haughty indignation. 

Above all be joy filled. Be so full of grace that it flows out from every pore of your person. Don’t go all legal on this issue. Just continue to meet, to pray, to fellowship, and to worship, in order to bring glory to God, so that all may be edified by the unity and love of the brethren.

So, pay to pray? Yes, there is a price to pay, but to pay a fine indicates assent that a law was broken. Has a law been broken? Perhaps. A better question is whose law may have been broken? Regardless, this small group should continue to meet for they are of the Kingdom of God. There may be consequences for such a pacifist response. Indeed, they should be willing to suffer the lawful consequences of continuing to gather.

Should they fight back? Peter and John were once confronted by the courts about preaching and teaching Christ crucified and raised:

But Peter and John replied, “Do you think God wants us to obey you rather than him? We cannot stop telling about everything we have seen and heard.” Acts 4:19-20

It is not a matter of fighting back. It is a matter of standing firm as members of the Kingdom of God. For as P&J stated so eloquently in Acts 4, we answer to Christ, not to men. What an honor, though uncomfortable, for this particular church to suffer for the name. Perhaps they should take note of how the early Christians in Acts 4 handled their civil harassment.

Peter and John return to their companions and retell of their trial before the high court. Upon hearing P&J’s tale, the believers raise their voices together and praise God. Unified in love and purpose, they acknowledge that these leaders were not against them, but rather these world leaders stand against Christ. They ask God to grant them ability to speak the Word with confidence.

They do not ask to get off from paying some penalty or for God to smite those terrible leaders. They ask they may speak the gospel with boldness. They aren’t all indignant that their rights as Americans were violated. They were not demanding justice. They merely desired to praise God and to preach him crucified and raised.

Guess what, immediately proceeding this event, this body of believers grew in both generosity and in numbers. This was a healthy, vibrant church. This is the opportunity set before this San Diego Fellowship.

So, am I shocked? Initially I shared Miss California’s angst, but an investigation of God’s word revealed the deeper truth. Peter said it best in 1Peter 4:12-13:

Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed.

So if bringing glory and honor to God is the price to pay, then yes, we not only ought to pay to pray, but we should rejoice while in the midst of doing so.

Additional Information

Nurse suspension over prayer ‘could lead to thousands more’

Primary school receptionist ‘facing sack’ after daughter talks about Jesus to classmate

Christian foster mother struck off after Muslim girl converts

Too Christian or Too Narrow?

These are the headlines that have been receiving some media coverage in Britain lately. What do they all have in common? Well, individuals are being censured or facing job loss due to sharing their Christian religious views with those they encounter while on the “job.” Just more evidence of the “end of days,” some evangelicals would agree.

Britain, a country that considers itself primarily Christian, appears to be distancing itself from the open practice of faith. Is this the beginning of a disturbing trend in Britain or just a reflection of what the culture is demanding – total separation of church and state? What about an individual’s right, as a citizen, to the freedom of speech and the freedom of religion?

The secular world is not the only one playing the “Big Brother” card. Even the Church of England has ruled that its members cannot join a  political group that supports views contrary to the church beliefs on racial equality. Just another law or rule rearing its ugly head within institutional Christianity?

So what does this all mean? Has there been an increase in cases against those in America who openly share their faith – any faith? Or is Christianity the only faith deemed worthy of protesting?

On the surface it appears that Christians are targeted for censure. Are Muslim expressions of religion censored? What about atheists? The glaring question is this, “What are we as evangelical Christians to make of all of these recent events?”

Additional Information

Christian foster mother struck off after Muslim girl converts

A foster mother with 10 years’ experience was struck off after a Muslim girl in her care converted to Christianity, it has emerged.

By Matthew Moore
Last Updated: 8:55PM GMT 08 Feb 2009

The woman has been banned by her local council for failing to prevent the teenager from getting baptised, even though the girl was 16 and made up her own mind to change religion.

The carer, a churchgoer in her 50s who has fostered more than 80 children, has now been forced to move out of her home.

She has lost the farmhouse she rented to look after vulnerable teenagers, due to the loss of income.

Another girl she was looking after has been taken back into care.

The woman, who has launched a legal challenge to the council’s challenge, told the Daily Telegraph: “I just want to get my life back.

“I still hope to resolve this so that I can possibly foster again in the future as I simply enjoy helping young people.”

Religious groups and fostering charities condemned the council’s decision, which comes amid a nationwide shortage of foster parents.

Last year the Fostering Network launched an urgent appeal for more than 5,000 families to come forward.

The ruling has increased concerns that Christians are becoming victims of discrimination in Britain, following the case of Caroline Petrie, the nurse suspended for offering to pray for a patient.

She was subsequently reinstated.

The foster mother, who cannot be named for legal reasons, insists that she did not pressurise the teenager to convert, and actually tried to discourage her initial interest.

The girl, who is now 17, was taken into care after being assaulted by a family member, saw baptism “as a washing away of the horrible things she had been through and a symbol of a new start,” the woman said.

“I offered her alternatives. I offered to find her places to practise her own religion.

“I offered to take her to friends or family. But she said to me from the word go: ‘I am interested and I want to come [to church]‘.”

The carer claims that social services were aware that the girl was attending her evangelical church, and council bosses only objected when she they found out she had been baptised.

Apostasy – the repudiation of one’s faith – is strongly condemned in the Koran and is considered taboo in Muslim communities.

Officials advised the teenager to reconsider her decision and stop attending Christian meetings, and in November struck the carer off their register, claiming she breached her duty of care as a foster parent.

“They consider that in some way she should have taken steps to prevent the conversion,” said solicitor Nigel Priestley, who is representing the carer.

He is demanding a judicial review into the council’s decision, claiming they have breached Article 9 of the Human Rights Act, which guarantees freedom of religion for both the carer and the girl.

He said that the teenager, who is now back with her parents, was “distressed” that her private faith had had such repercussions, and is supporting her former carer’s legal bid.

Mike Judge of the Christian Institute, which is funding the carer’s legal case, said: “I cannot imagine that an atheist foster carer would be struck off if a Christian child in her care stopped believing in God.

“This is the sort of double standard that Christians are facing in Britain.”

Mr Priestley said that the council had now offered to review its decision, but said his client was prepared to pursue legal action if her case was not resolved.

The council in the north of Englandm, which also cannot be named, declined to comment on “sensitive issues surrounding a child in care”.

Additional Information

December is gone. Can’t say that I really miss it. I was sick for more than half of the month. It seemed as if I accomplished very little and relationally I felt totally disconnected.

The Christmas season is always full of turmoil and chaos – a bitter reminder of the fallen state of this world – a testimonial to the total malfunction of my family. The days shorten and the nights lengthen almost seeming endless. How I detest the long winter nights. How I long for a glimmer of light – a beacon of hope.

Though most years the Christmas season brings me little comfort and joy, this December was different. This time it brought the good, the bad and the ugly.

The Ugly

My attitude should top the list of what was truly repugnant during this season. Once I got sick, all I wanted to do was throw in the towel, so to speak. I really didn’t want to go shopping for presents; I didn’t want to decorate the house or bake the traditional confectionaries for which my children were clamoring. I especially did not want to make special holiday dinners with all the preparation and cleaning that such meals require. As for being hospitable, I missed the mark. All I longed to do was to sit by the fire, gaze into its glorious light and bask in glowing warmth.

The Christmas tree incident gets top-billing as the most loathsome. Steve and Evan go out to purchase our tree. Knowing that I love blue spruce trees, they go out and select a spruce that they think I would like. Instead of being gracious and pleased with their efforts, I scowl that the tree is not tall enough. The worst part is that I knew I was wrong – I knew I was being irrational – I just could not stop myself from behaving in such an infantile manner. Now that is just plain ugly.

The Bad

Circumstances were unfavorable. I was in poor health. Even though I had been reaching out to my mother for months – no years, little progress had been made in restoring our relationship to our former closeness.

I had planned on writing my brothers Rob and Den – Michael too. I failed at doing this. This flu had lingered and I was emotionally and physically spent. I felt myself fighting the urge to hibernate and go “tribal.”

I felt my heart had indeed become as hard and unyielding – ruthless as that of the character Angel-eyes. My plans to intrude into their lives slipped away – a book my brother and I would read a children sits in my locker, unwrapped – evidence of plans never set in motion. Failure – it just feels so bad.

The Good

Not all of December was a loss. There were actually some wonderful blessings that came out of that month. Some were planned, others were gracious gifts from God. I was totally undeserving. God is good.

I had been hoping to invite my family to the children’s program at our Central Teaching. Those plans seems unattainable due to our facilities upheaval. Then, a gala was planned and a venue was found. God allowed me to work with the kids and with the amazing parents of the OASIS kids to put together a little children’s program. Once again this body of Christ blew me away with their generosity and love.

My mother attended the gala. My heart was truly filled with the joy of hope and possibilities. Not only did she attend but Melissa and Michelle were able to attend. Michelle even came to one of our Home Church meetings. What joy God allowed me to partake.

The sweetest part of the holidays was the potential that I have to rebuild my relationship with my brother Michael. We got to talking about the crazy rifts in relationships in our family. Michael and I agreed that we may not be able to do anything – yet – about the state of our ties to our other brothers – but we are able to work on our relationship.

Sweeter still is that Michael is receptive to checking out our fellowship. I have prayed for my bro for years – and now during the darkest month of the year – a brilliant light shines forth. The light of possible redemption.

So, January is a month of endings and of beginnings. December came to an end – bringing to a close the sorrows and tumult. December also ended with potential beginnings – the start of a renewed relationship and the hope of new life.

Indeed, God is good.

Additional Information

Richard Cooey died today. He was executed by lethal injection as punishment for a heinous crime. He kidnapped, robbed, raped, bludgeoned and slaughtered two Akron University students in 1986. Twenty-two years have passed since he took the lives of those two young women.

I went to high school with Cooey. In fact, I sat in the same driver’s ed car as he did. He was short and pudgy. I recall his round, pale face only brightened by a splattering of freckles and copper hair. His stone cold eyes stared blankly back at me as I forgot to slow down for a stop sign. I think his eyes were blue. He was not a warm person.

I remember that day so well when Cooey was arrested. I had just returned from Morgan Adhesives. I had a summer job compounding emulsions and solutions. I spent a lot of time around volatile glue. I wondered if I had heard the newscaster correctly, after all I had been in a fume-filled lab all day. Then an image of a round, ruddy man, face hidden, walking into the jail blazed across the old RCA television screen. It was him. I was not confused.

Since that day, I have followed this case with interest. What outrage the local community felt. Such a great loss of life. Such great pain. Where was the justice? Why was he allowed to live such a long life compared to that of his victims?

Today justice was finally enacted. Richard died at 10:26 am by lethal injection. All final appeals were denied. He was taken to Lucasville Monday afternoon. There he died.

I thought some how that I would feel “better” knowing that justice had been served – that he had to pay for what he had done. He was an enemy of society. He was evil. He had to give up his life. I felt worse.

Evil. That is how all men are before the holiness of God. We are His enemies. We determine what is right in our own eyes. We deserve judgment. You see, God demands that a price be paid for sin. Someone has to pay the price.

I’d like to consider myself a “pretty good” person. I have never robbed, raped or murdered anyone. Compared to Cooey, I am a saint. In the sight of God, I am just as evil and guilty as this murderer is. God sees Cooey and I as the same.

Only by the grace of God have I been deemed righteous. What a debt of gratitude I owe. Someone had to pay the price for my sin – to set me free from the debt of sin that I owe. God demands perfection. As much as I’d like to believe I am perfect – I am far from that. I am quite the sinner. Christ came to free the prisoners from their bondage. He came to redeem. Christ’s death bought me back from death. I am His.

This brings me back to Cooey. Instead of feeling better, I feel so sorrowful. God does not want anyone to perish, but all to come to repentance.

2Peter 3:9

The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance.

God extended 22 years to this man who butchered Dawn McCreery and Wendy Offredo. He had the opportunity to come to repentance. God did not want, even Cooey, to perish. He wanted Richard to have a personal relationship with him.

I guess Richard Cooey had a terrible upbringing. A lot a bad things happened in his life. God had mercy on Cooey up until his death. I wonder if he ever came to know Christ.

I deserve the wrath of God to be poured out on my head. I deserve to perish. Praise God for His unending mercy that he sought me out and that I responded to his calling. I accepted His free gift and now have a relationship with Him. I am now alive.

In light of these things, I realize that God desires all men and women to come into a relationship with him – not just the “nice” people or the smart people or the beautiful people – but everyone – whether they are mean, ignorant or just plain ugly.

Jesus came to save sinners – not the righteous. Sinners like me and yes, sinners like Richard Cooey.

Grace is truly amazing – and so contrary to the reason of man.

Additional Information

Toilet, toilet, and more toilets! I can’t seem to get away from the topic of toilets. My youngest two sons sing the praise of port-a-potties as they head out the door for school. They claim that they are the most amazing invention of all time!

Then I turn on the radio. Ugh….

For the second day in a row toilets have been making the headlines. This time it is the toilet in the International Space Station. How crappy is that? I mean – you are in the vacuum of space in this high tech tin can and there is no place to take a pee.  Don’t even think about number two.

Seriously, where do you go when the toilet is broken? Port-a-potties are out of the question. So where can a guy get some relief? In a space jar? And is it even possible to pee into a jar in space with the whole “weightless” and low gravity thing going down? Who wants human waste floating by while performing some experiment or taking a nap?  Just nasty, I say.

It is not as if you can go outside and take a leak on the bushes.  The whole vacuum of space thing ruins that option. Since the “bush” option is out, NASA has pulled together a team of scientists to repair the malfunctioning “head.” They actually have an entire team of scientists working on this round the clock.

I heard that the shuttle launch maybe postponed so that necessary replacement parts will make it to the space station. I guess NASA does not just have spare toilet innards readily available – after all this is a very special space commode. It is the most expensive toilet in the world.

The way the news agencies are carrying on you’d think that the poor astronauts haven’t relieved themselves for days – that they are all hopping around trying to hold it until the cavalry appears with the supplies to save the day – when in fact a toilet has been rigged and the team is using the Soyuz head until replacement parts for the Zvezda service module toilet arrive on the next shuttle mission.

The Soyuz won’t hold much so look out earth – one wrong or enormous movement and “there she blows,” so to speak.

The earth awaits – holding her breath – and nose. Will the replacement parts arrive in time? Will the shuttle mission save humanity from its own filth? Will there be a reenactment of the “big bang?” Will someone suffer a bladder infection since they had to hold it?

Oh, the possibilities! I guess I will just have to tune in tomorrow for another update on Space Toilets.

Additional Information

Do not call me, Barack!

It was the night before the primaries and all through the house
the phones were a-ringing, I sneered at my spouse.
I slammed the phone down for I now I do fear,
That casting a vote, I now must not dare.

I don’t know about you but I am tired so tired of the phone ringing; I suppose it is my fault – I participate in nearly every election. To vote is a privilege I cherish and honor.

Usually I labor over the issues considering each candidates platform – I delve into the meat of the issues. I always believed that each vote matters.

Well tomorrow will be different - very different. I will still vote – but the decision process has changed. I will cast my vote for the candidate who does not call me. 

Hilliary just called now – so she is out. Barack has called multiple times. Too bad – I kind of liked him. Even Tom Sawyer called – Is he even running? Ken Blackwell called too and I know he is not running.

So please Senator McCain, if you are there – do not call me. Oh Ralph Nader – please don’t call me either. For the love of sanity please stop calling me.

I am the only one who feels this way?

Sorry – I just needed to vent.

Additional Information

I have been listening to callers on a local talk show respond to Ms. Porter’s statement concerning her choice to forgive Bobby Cutts.  Some people thought she spoke with astonishing grace and power while many more have criticized her words as “over-dramatic” or an attempt to hide the dysfunction of her broken home.

This is how the world views love – the authentic love of Christ. When you dare to go against the logic of this world- its brutal justice, against the wisdom of the ruler of this world or when you respond to suffering and to genuine harm with redemptive discipline, the world hates you.  As the world hated Christ when he loved the broken and the lost, so too will the world hate those who love Christ – those who follow in his ways. The world hates those who dare to defy its system and who choose to align themselves with biblical principles.

To Ms. Porter and to all those who choose love, I encourage you with these words from the gospel of John:

 From John 15:

“If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first. If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you.”

 Again scripture addresses the rage and venomous energy hurled at those who abide in Christ:

1 John 3:12

Do not be surprised, my brothers, if the world hates you.

Patty Porter understands something so precious that those who belong to the world cannot comprehend; she understands that she now has a new identity – that she has received a gift that she never deserved – she has been reconciled to God through Christ Jesus.

“Once you had no identity as a people; now you are God’s people. Once you received no mercy; now you have received God’s mercy.

To those of the world, Christ and his forgiveness is a stumbling block – his love is so irrational!

“He is the stone that makes people stumble, the rock that makes them fall.”

Christ’s love just does not make any sense to those who do not know him; they are so confused and lost. Christ came as the Good Shepherd to seek out the lost and to bring them into the protection of his fold.

Pondering these things gives me courage – to be bold and not afraid when I walk into the spiritual realm of warfare – I realize that victory has already gone to the Lord. All authority has been given to Christ and we as believers command this authority as his servants who go forth in His name and under His power.

So in light of these things, I am increasingly excited that Christ has imputed to His body the impactful, healing power of authentic love – I long to more deeply comprehend the heights and depths and breadth of the love of Christ.

I end with this Pauline prayer from Ephesians:

And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is.

Additional Information

If you have been following the Bobby Cutts trial, you’d know that a verdict of guilty was reached.  For those of you unfamiliar with this local case, Bobby Cutts (a Canton police officer) was tried and convicted of murdering his pregnant girl friend, Jesse Davis, and their unborn daughter Chloe. This case had national coverage. Today a sentence was imposed. 

I usually don’t follow trials or watch court TV; however, a live broadcast of the sentencing trail was aired on WNIR. What I found so compelling about this sentencing hearing was the portion where the family of the victim expressed its thoughts and desires concerning the defendant – Bobby Cutts in this case.

Jesse’s sisters and father all expressed rage, confusion, hate, and disgust for this man – especially for his lies and for the brutality of this crime against their loved one – a sister – a daughter. I was moved by their statements. One person’s sentiments stood out during this highly charged, emotional portion of the hearing – Jesse’s mother.

Jesse’s mom, Patty Porter, is a member of Akron’s House of the Lord Church and has been a member for nearly a decade.  The House of the Lord is pastored by Bishop Joey Johnson. I have heard Bishop Joey teach and he is a knowledgable and inspired teacher.

I was struck – even stunned as I heard Ms. Porter speak during this hearing.  She spoke of her confusion that none of this made sense; she spoke of her sorrow and loss; she spoke of forgiveness and hope. 

This mother, who arrived at her daughter’s apartment one muggy June morning to find her 2 year old grandson abandoned and unkempt, pled with the judge to make ”a way for Bobby to have a relationship with his son.” She urged Bobby and others to consider their personal standing before the Lord.  She chose forgiveness.  She told Bobby, convicted murderer of her daughter and yet-to-be-born granddaughter, to look at her.  

Her words turned to forgiveness. She chose to forgive him as she has no right not to forgive him; she acknowledged Bobby’s sin – taking two lives, lying, the hurt that Blake (Bobby and Jesse’s son must endure). She also envisioned a hopeful future of reconciliation – not just between Blake and his father, Bobby, but also between Bobby and the Lord.

Christ has empowered this woman to take a stand; Patty Porter is not a victim – NO! She is victorious and moved toward this man who deserved nothing! She did not explain away or excuse the actions of this man – she saw his actions for what they were – evil and hurtful – ungodly. But she saw a way – a victorious way to impart love to Bobby Cutts.

What a witness this woman was to the world today – everyone on Court TV saw her or heard her words on the radio. So powerful – so redemptive! Once again I am moved to tears. I ask myself, “Could you,Lisa, extend the same forgiveness and love?” “Am I able to live this way in matters of the heart – in things less horrific?”

I’d like to say I could through choice and through Him – this is what Patty Porter said – “through Him I can forgive you, Bobby,” her voiced cracked with pain as she spoke those words – her wounded heart desiring so much to move towards Bobby in grace.

Philippians 4:13

I can do everything through him who gives me strength.

I believe her – I truly believe that she desires what God desires – that all men come to Him and know Him – even the one who violently murdered her daughter and granddaughter – even Bobby Cutts.

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